Looking at my resume, thinking: “I could of obsessively and insanely chased after a production/journalism career.” However, the Lord has awoken my abilities to an extreme level. I cannot sit here no more and regret neither sob over 3rd-4th place skills that I can apply through my journey while I have 1st-2nd place abilities that will work highly within my family, personality, jobs, and many more.
You see…I saw/heard the Truth when I hear that my husband is promotive, that my sister in law is successfully going through a PH.D, that I see my in laws less stress and happier (enjoying their senior years), when I see that every person that surrounds me are loving, supportive and grateful for things that I’ve accomplished (marriage, home, job, baby, etc.). But all these things haven’t come if I weren’t have been a caregiver, a humble and sentimental friend, a listener, a guardian, a “you need a hug” companion, determine, spiritual…
Lord, I searched, searched and searched… I’ve seen my purpose now, though I’m still a little sketchy, I have found the one thing that never fails to make me content. With that said, I’m no longer searching for approval neither keeping testimonies nor am I dismissing my Holy Spirit which has brought me this far in my life… I am a successful, emotionally-revealing, inner-dependent (soul food crabber) lady 🙂
~~Poetic entry from Morada Lila~~
I hear within me an angel whispering. Asking me to do kind things. Telling me to just try it, be worthy of what you have and be thoughtful and aware of those that don’t. Seems that Jesus is trying to tell his children to not be afraid/fear to extent a hand to those who are struggling, who have loss and were derailed from a specific path, who feel that there’s nothing left in this world but struggles and just “unworthy, pity” request… I hear the angel. She directs me; reminding me the importance of Christ’s birth and sacrifice. It’s the thought that counts; “strange” bold gestures of walking up to them and saying: “God bless you” or simply smiling and not looking away making them ashamed or hopeless… I hear an angel and she is my Holy Spirit directing me to reveal the love of God. I shall listen, for all that I have (friends, family, home, job, life etc) is due to his Grace, Wisdom and Love… and I owe this all to Him.
~~Poetic sayings from Morada Lila~~
For a quick second I have forgotten who I am. I’m unsure whether it’s the people surrounding me or this city in particular that has made me run full speed into a cement wall. In the words of the Proverbs, I must build boundaries. I don’t know if it’s this town that makes me feel like $ $ $. A profit for the rich, just a number for our so called modern “founding fathers.” Let me remind you…………… let me remind myself about these boundaries. If this city, government……… the brain washing politicians; who portray leadership, have tried to market themselves instead of fore-showing their truth (I’m not buying it NO MORE). Let me reinstate; within my boundaries, I am under God with shields in hand, standing out for what’s Truth. Indivisible; attempt to tear down these walls, over my dead body! The God I know, no matter what religious denomination we’re in he loves us equally. With Liberty and Justice for all…
Someday you’ll open your eyes; when you do, I will be there holding you. I will wipe away your tears when you get your first scar. I want to make sure you live your purpose; we got your back. You will never feel alone or confused. I won’t hide any secrets, I want you to be yourself. As you grow, I will sing to you, pray for you, laugh and cry with you… we will enjoy life because God has blessed us.
There will be times when you will feel scared; when you look back I am cheering for you. There will be times when you want to fight; when you are fist pumping I am disciplining you with TLC. There will be times when you want to be right; you will turn around and I will be holding a book in my hand telling you stories about righteous people. When I am gone… you will turn around, you will see me in the mist of the light underneath the stars and sunsets… Our spirits will never be apart… I will be proud of you till the end of time.